1. If you could choose your accoutrements, what would they be?
2. If you could be worn by anyone, whom would it be?
Gabby Reece. I mean…
3. Can you say something that would annoy the average, hard-working person?
You have as many hours in the day as Elizabeth and Philip.
Get it? They have regular jobs, kids and also spy for the Soviets. That last one your average, hard-working person doesn’t do.
4. What is a dream that will never be realized?
To have Eleanore Powell perform while wearing me.
5. Below are stills of Katharine Ross and Paula Prentiss from “The Stepford Wives.” What would today’s comment sections have to say about these particular sartorial choices made by mothers?
My guess is people groaning on about the fact that these women aren’t twenty-one anymore and how mothers shouldn’t dress this way and what disgusting, sad excuses for human flesh they are and how they should just die, DIE, DIE! You know, your standard internet responses to benign situations. As you can see, it’s a real “dance around the maypole” scene out there in anonymousville. And not for nothin’, but isn’t the whole scenario I just laid out a bit Stepfordian in nature? Clearly, current day opinions didn’t exist in the seventies and so what happened exactly to change minds on exposed midriff while donning very short shorts post a certain age and or entrance into motherhood? Now, don’t take this as a start-up to some rebel yell, telling all women to run down the street naked; hardly, it’s simply a musing. When did the reigns start to tighten is all I’d like to know. They seemed to loosen at some point then no more. Something happened but what exactly? Maybe a slow burn, silent revolution that has lead to a much more puritanical society, creating a chasm between sex and rectitude so whacking that to bare certain parts of your body is now deemed, and at times severely treated as a statement as opposed to something one simply wears. Were the opinions there all along, incubating, just waiting? Did the comment section simply become the host to latch onto? Or did a counter-counterculture move in and swipe brains at some point, doing away with all the strides made way back when? I’ve never really considered myself a conspiracy theorist but hey… That said, I really think I’m onto something.
6. You just might be. Next question. If you were to inspire a book, what would be the title?
“I Fell in Love with a Robber Baron and I Feel a Little Dirty Because of It”
7. After the book sales go through the roof and the publisher demands a follow-up, what would that title be?
8. And the third? There has to be a third. Please tell me there’s a third.
“Whoops! I Had a Drunken One-Night-Stand with the Robber Baron and Let’s Just Say I’m Pregnant and Now We’re Getting Married”
9. I’m on the edge of my seat. How does the series end?
“Me, My Baby and Half of the Robber Baron’s Net Worth with Every Cent Distributed Amongst Those Pulverized By the Economic Crash”