1. If you could style yourself, what would be the accouterments?
Well, for sure, without a doubt, for starters it would have to be the–
2. Can I just say I find myself going back to watch the A/W-12 show over and over again? My god, perfection on every level as far as I’m concerned.
Um… Thank you? It had absolutely nothing to do with me but…
3. Oh! I’m so sorry. Did I offend you? That wasn’t meant to offend. It was meant only as a compliment. Honest engine it was.
Did you see me anywhere on that runway? Huh? Just because we have the same label doesn’t mean we’re of the same ilk.
4. I’m so sorry. Really. It’s just that when I see you I can’t help but see the entire Burberry family. Does that make sense?
Let me guess. Some of your best friends are Burberry.
5. And I don’t know if I like what I think I’m being accused of. I was raised to see every item as an individual piece, thank you very much. Now, considering I’m leading the charge of this interview, I’d like to declare a truce, a misunderstanding, whatever you’d like to call it. Is that okay? Can we start over?
Okay, fine. Where was I? Oh yes. I would accoutre myself with–
6. And the models didn’t wear A/W-12, A/W-12 wore the models. Am I right?! Wait. I might be wrong. I’m confused. Models wear clothes but clothes wear… No, I think I’m right. The clothes wore the models! But in a good way! The best way!
Hey, lady! I thought we were here to talk about me!
7. And we are. Definitely, we are. We definitely are. It’s just that the soundtrack was also so amazing. Joan Armatrading, Marina & the Diamonds… I can’t! I’m getting all tingly just thinking about it! Kensington Gardens! The clap of thunder followed by the rain! Before you knew it the opening chords of “To Build a Home” were upon you! The umbrellas! The glitter! Oh my goodness, how can I forget about the glitter?! I’m sorry! It never fails! I always get choked up. Can you excuse me?
(mumbled) This is some bullshit.
8. And did you see Mario at the end?! He knew! The man knew he had just witnessed genius! Brava, Christopher! Brava! Amazing! There I go again! And the tears keep comin’, folks! Ha! Wait! You’re not leaving? Look! No more tears! I’m fine now! Let’s talk about you! I’m feeling the love! Get it?!
9. Okay, alright… We can do without the language. *door slams* Oh, look at me! I’m a Burberry shirt that slams doors! Who needs ya?! ‘Cause I don’t! (I briefly whistled no particular tune) Well, seeing as though I have some free time on my hands why not dance, right? I can answer that. Right!