1. If you could choose one person to be worn by, who would it be?
The man who up and decides, in the middle of a work day, that he’s bidding farewell the thankless, cubicle dwelling, straphanger life and taking to the open road, without a plan and with me on his back. But before he makes his final exit, he moves over to his former computer, logs onto YouTube, finds “Sweet Freedom” and gives his co-workers the most earnest, out of key, flailing limbed, stapler-acting-as-a-microphone performance of a lifetime. The performance gets a bit of added momentum when he spots a few people — still looking on with “dude is nuts” expressions — starting to bob their heads to the beat. Save for Glenda. Glenda’s smiling big, having been sucked back to her days as a Soul Train dancer and from the waste up she’s putting invisible magnet letters on the invisible scramble board and resurrecting dance moves that heard the death knell as far back as ’78, “Those were some good ol’ days. Days when a red leotard on this body wasn’t considered a crime scene.”
2. And then who knows what’s waiting for him, right?!
Well, security but other than that… Yeah, I’m assuming pretty exciting stuff.
3. If not you then what?
A Common Projects two pocket, accordion wallet.
4. What is something you abhor in people?
The blatant riding of coattails while making others believe you’re steering the vessel.
5. What is your least favorite question?
6. If you could be reimagined by another artist who would it be?
The Unknown Hipster
7. What makes you dynamic?
I’m gonna need you to whittle that down to a finer point?
8. What is something about you we would otherwise not know?
I don’t enjoy hunting.
9. Is there a word you would like to soon see retire?